Blog Archive for 2004

  • New Year~su!

    NewYearFun! I met up with Adam, Ant and Rich at Adam’s house to start with, for Pop’n, IIDX and sake, then walked up to the Talbot Arms for the evening. Unfortunately Richard wasn’t feeling great and had to go home… The evening wasn’t all that exciting, but at least no mingers of doom like last year! ^^ Elise turned up later after doing delivery driving until 10pm - eek! We stayed until about 1, then headed home. Adam forgot his housekeys and phone so couldn’t get back home, and so both him and I decided to go to Ant’s house instead. We got absolutely drenched on the way back! >< Anyway, we stayed up for another hour and a half at least at Ant’s house, and Ant and I watched some more Bottle Fairy, which owns.

  • First Dreams of the New Year

    Admittedly, my only idea that the first dream of a new year should be special comes from Azumanga Daioh, but… I wonder… If only the dream I had two nights ago happened last night, it would have been awesome… As it was, the dream was kinda’ messed up and confusing and really stupid in the way lots of dreams are… It was something to do with counter-terrorism, like being in the SAS or something, but all the things that happened, happened in either a desert, or a strange superposition of a hotel, a hospital, and Southampton Uni. All I can really remember now is that it involved a lot of running around…

  • Back Here Again

    It seems kinda’ odd being back here again, but then… we were only away for three weeks… Bournemouth, I’ve decided (with all my friends and family there) is better than Southampton. But living here is great too! We celebrated our first evening back as Flat 4 by… drinking and ordering a takeaway pizza! Nothing ever changes, does it? ^_^

  • Ugh

    I can’t be having with any more of this work tonight, even though I still have half of both my Quanta and my Forces & Fields problem sheets, plus a maths problem sheet, to do by Friday… oh, and there’s a Circuit Theory test on Friday too, what fun! Bleh…

  • A day of nothingness...

    So, today. I have achieved exactly nothing. Done nothing, except eat. Tomorrow, i think I really need to start doing something worthwhile…

  • Home for lunch

    Nothing much to say, life’s quite boring. Lots of work to do, going to play Exalted tonight.

  • Ugh... Brain... fried...

    Yay~su… Exalted went on until 2am yesterday, then add on the walk home, getting ready for bed, and waking up at 7.30 this morning - I got three and a half hours sleep last night! Since I did manage to get up at 7.30 I made the effort and went in for my Maths tutorial, but I couldn’t think straight the whole time, and kept closing my eyes… That’s why I gave up on the other two lectures that I had (in theory) today, since I really would have just fallen asleep.

  • Messed up Body Clock fun

    I got nearly twice as much sleep this afternoon than I did last night… Hopefully by stocking up on food and coffee now I can manage to get some work done this evening, and hopefully I might be able to get to sleep when I need to, rather than lying awake not being able to fall asleep…

  • Still wasting away my life...

    …not working as hard as I should, being distracted, doing nothing… I… don’t know why this is what my life is becoming… Or whether it’s a good or a bad thing… It’s almost like being outside of time, watching the hours flow past like lucid memories, my mind forgetting their passing as soon as they have gone…

  • Blargle

    For the second day in a row, I haven’t had time to do my laundry. \o/ I must really stink… I did manage to go shopping today, so at least I can eat now. I didn’t do any baking, or any revision, though… and now I’ve got an annoying headache that paracetamol doesn’t seem to be shifting, so I had to stay in tonight, rather than going out with everyone to celebrate the arrival of our new flatmate…

  • Chores day three: Moderate Success!

    (Insert Big Brother voice-over) It’s day three in the Hinata Inn, aka Flat Four, and that lazy bastard Ian has got off his arse and done something!

  • Honorary Chemist!

    Well, today was a really rather cool day! I had my maths exam this morning… it was sorta’ annoying that I didn’t have time to finish all the questions that I could have done, but I think I did pretty well on the stuff that I did get to answer… And, yeah. I spent the afternoon playing Soul Calibur 2 at John’s flat, which was pretty awesome, then I became an honorary Chemist for the evening and joined the Chemistry guys in Wetherspoons… and then we went on to Flares.

  • Anxiety, Indecision, Photoshop and the Need for Milk

    Anxiety: First off, I’ve got a viva / viver / however you spell it for Electronics tomorrow afternoon, which’ll probably be okay, but first I’ve got to catch up with my notes from lab sessions and the project. Because I didn’t really write anything much in my lab book as we were going along… so I’ve gotta catch up now before my lecturer asks to see it tomorrow. Eeek! But anyway, I’ve got the project circuit diagram printed off, so now all I have to do is write up some notes for the project and for two weeks of labs, pretending that I’m writing them at the time I was actually doing them… ^_^;; I’ll maybe write some stuff about the project tonight, then do the lab stuff tomorrow when I meet up with james before the viva / viver / haddock.

  • Boring Weekend...

    Well, I went back to my parents’ place to get some peace and quiet for revision this weekend… and yeah, it was really quiet ^^;; I did plenty of revision for the Forces & Fields exam on Tuesday, which I’m happy about… and I got lectured at twice by my parents, which I’m not. Just because they asked me to do the washing up rather than me doing it on my own, and because I didn’t mind what train I took back to Southampton, doesn’t mean I “don’t show initiative” 0;;

  • Just an Excuse for a Quiz, Really

    Going into Uni in a minute for dinner, and this afternoon’s Electronics exam. I still haven’t revised yet, and really I don’t think there’s any point in me actually doing so… I’m trying for 100% here anyway, although I doubt I’ll make it at University level… worth a shot though!

  • PapapapaYeah~~!

    Woohaha, I’ve finished my exams! Today’s Forces and Fields exam didn’t go so bad… I guess it was a pretty good idea to do that practice paper at the weekend… It caused a bit of trouble, but I finished well before time. And the Electronics exam yesterday, I pwned! =p I’m seriously hoping for 100% for the exam there.

  • Most Bizarre Night

    Well, last night was the first time I’ve actually danced with someone in a club… O_O Not that it’s much like dancing, more like just… moving slightly while rubbing against someone… ;;;; Well, I lernt two things there… one, apparently I’m “not assertive enough” - yeah, I could’a told you that… and second, I guess I’m not much of a physical person… I found it kinda embarassing to touch someone like that… ^^;;

  • Snowsnowsnowsnowsnowsnowsnowsnowsnow...

    SNOW!

  • Radical Dreaming

    So, super fun dreams last night… I think I managed to have two pretty-much-complete dreams last ngiht.

  • Okay, I Hate Computers Now

    Apologies for being temporarily or mostly offline during the last few days. For what must now be approaching the tenth time, I’ve decided to give Linux a go. Since I wasn’t in a game-playing mood at all, I decided it might be good to switch for a while. Getting my MP3s playing is still a challenge, and I’m still running in 1024x768 because the relevant people haven’t released the drivers yet. They said it’d be yesterday, but guess what - it wasn’t.

  • Lonely Dreamer

    It… kinda’ hit me today. I think I’m lonely here. Sure, we have fun sometimes, my flatmates and I, but maybe the most fun I have in the evenings is sitting in front of this terminal, chatting on IRC, drinking a beer and eating chocolate… I dunno, does that make me a geek, or a loner, or what? But whatever it does, I’m not sure it matters to me…

  • Recursive Dreaming

    I dreamt that I was asleep… and then I woke up, but I was still in a dream… It was the oddest experience…

  • So, Yeah, Updates.

    Sorry I haven’t been updating much recently… been busy.

  • Wasted Time

    So… I woke up at 9:30 this morning, thought “I’ve only had eight hours’ sleep, I can get away with one more”, intending to get up about 10:30 and go shopping, which I badly needed to do today.

  • Dreaming Through the Days

    I’ve officially done nothing this weekend. And I wanted to get an early night… which just hasn’t happened. Tomorrow I get to go shopping, and watch Grave of the Fireflies, a double bill of depression! At least I’ll enjoy the latter somewhat more than the former…

  • Ye Gods, What a Dream...

    Ugh… I just dreamt that I was dying of cancer and had one day to live, and of the things I did in that day… And then, I didn’t die that night, so I had another “final” day… And from that dream, I’m now sure of two things… that I want Dreaming Awake (finished or not) to carry on forever, and that my parents and I love each other more than anything else in the world…

  • Successful Mission!

    Today, I managed to go shopping, play Mage, and learn about General Relativity! Bonus! Now I just need some serious sleep (or as it looks like being, about 5 hours…) before tomorrow’s fateful presentation of death… Wish me luck! ^_^

  • Valentine's Day in Geekland

    So, did you all have a nice Valentine’s day? And, really, does it matter?

  • Wasted Time

    So… another weekend wasted. I should have done more work, I shouldn’t have spent the whole of this afternoon in the pub, and I certainly shouldn’t have spent as much money as I have done. Somehow, before Thursday morning, I have to do 11 hours of lectures, go shopping, do my laundry, visit the estate agents’, play Exalted, play Mage, and do three problem sheets, two of which actually require re-learning the material since I wasn’t awake enough in lectures to actually pay attention. This week is gonna suck.

  • Diary of a Day of Troubles ~My Heartache~

    Why… Why won’t anything good happen today…? … Here goes, today in a nutshell.

  • Triumph and Disaster of the Laundry Crusade

    So, I try to cheat the system. It’s virtually impossible to do the laundry here without a two hour wait, even at times when most people have lectures. So, my solution? Go at a time when people not only don’t tend to go, but when others would think it’s a ludicrous time to do laundry. So, at 8:30 this morning, I go and do my laundry. Success! The laundry room’s empty, I manage to wash and dry in under an hour.

  • Exam Results

    <table border=1 bordercolor=#000000 cellpadding=10><tr><td>School of Physics and Astronomy - Semester 1 Examination Results - February 2004

  • Wasting Days

    I’m really tired, and I have been all day… there’s been nothing to do that I really want to do… The only bit of useful work I did all day was do some graphics for Adam’s latest stepfile, Love’s Rebirth by Third Project. It’s been an interesting job trying to find out where this song originally comes from, and I haven’t had a lot of success. The only references to it I can find on the ‘net are either about Rogue’s TM4 entry or a BMS file for it. I’d assumed from the BMS that it was originally from some flavour of Beatmania, but Fuse didn’t seem to think so, so… I dunno ^_^

  • Best thing evar.

    I wish I lived in Japan, was female, and weighed less than 50kg…

  • Devoid of Purpose

    Overcast day
    Evening light fading away

    Twilight

  • Falling Apart...

    From some recent LJ posts (Phi’s and Frieza’s especially), plus the stuff that’s been going on on the DDRFUK forums and IRC channel, I’m kinda’ worried… There seems to be a lot of bad stuff going on that I’m only scraping the surface of.

  • An odd day so far...

    I woke up after having a fairly odd dream, but was wide awake from the moment I got up. Easily made it to the lecture on time. Then, I started to get irritated by everything, I don’t know why. Itchy seats, people whispering, the lecturer taking about five minutes expalining what convection was when we’ve blatantly know what it was for at least five years… that kinda’ thing.

  • Memories of Pancakes

    I’ve just been making them in the kitchen for my flatmates, we might be making them at Exalted tonight (but last I heard, we weren’t)…

  • Dancing in the Snow

    And today, things are finally looking up! I got a lot more work done today than I’d normally do, and also it wooks like the Southampton Uni Anime Soc is finally getting underway, as we now have the required 25 members!

  • Comedown

    I’ve just come back from a weekend at home for my mum’s birthday… it was kinda’ boring there, but kinda’ good also… it’s good to be relaxed occasionally.

  • Housing Situation

    In the space of 10 minutes, I now have two possible groups I could join in with for house-hunting… looks like it may not be so bad after all…

  • Almost a new Story Arc

    I think I can finally see things becoming better… Minami’s coming up, I might have found a place to live in Southampton, the Dreaming Awake roleplay system’s finally coming together, and… I just kinda’ feel that I’m on top of things. On the other hand, Dom still isn’t happy, which kinda’ puts a downer on things, but I’m sure the new arc will deserve to start soon… A change from the current, depressing, one will be good. Current favourite title for the next one is “Sun Dancer” saga.

  • Frustration

    I don’t know why, but… everything I do seems to be annoying me today. IRC annoys me, Ragnarok Online (normally the most addictive thing ever) annoys me, even blogging annoys me. It’s dark outside, which is kinda’ annoying for some reason, I’ve wasted an entire day doing nothing… Any music I care to listen to annoys me, I feel like I’ve got a headache coming on, I’ve got too much energy… Argh! This really is the worst feeling, because I know there’s nothing I can do to sort it out, since it’s so irrational…

  • It's official...

    Copying all the quotes from the now-defunct MMWP site into the new quotes system is actually more annoying than death itself. It’s going really slowly, too…

  • Not much to report

    My life seems pretty good at the moment, excepting the 1500 word essay on damping in oscillatory systems that’s due in on Friday and I haven’t started yet. Anyway, just a cheap excuse to nick Fi’s quiz really.

  • Wasting Away...

    I had to wake up four hours late today, missing today’s lectures, just so I could get a sensible amount of sleep… that can’t be good. I still haven’t started the 1500 word essay that’s in for Friday, and now I have to run to make it to this afternoon’s Gamesoc meeting…

  • 14 hours 30 minutes...

    …until MINAMICON!! This weekend might possibly be one of the most awesome weekends of my life…

  • Shining Brighter than the Sun

    So… Minami Con 10. Where to start?

  • Brief Moments, Fading...

    *“Hello, little star
    Are you doing fine?
    I’m lonely as everything in birth
    Sometimes in the dark
    When I close my eyes
    I dream of you, the planet Earth
    If I could fly across this night
    Faster than the speed of light
    I would spread these wings of mine
    Through the years and far away
    Far beyond the milky way
    See the shine that never blinks
    The shine that never fades…” *

    • “Through the Years and Far Away”, Hoshi no Koe Soundtrack

  • Best thing ever.

    .hack//Liminality. It’s so messed up, it’s great!

  • One of the worst nights out...

    In the words of Chris, “Screw this shit, I’m done.”

  • Frustration

    Argh… I want to do something.. something creative. But there’s really not a lot to do… I’d like to design some graphics in Photshop, but I know I’m not good enough to achieve a good effect… I’d like to do some stuff for my websites, but I’m really not sure if there’s anything I can do. There’s just… nothing useful I can do, at all…

  • Still Waiting for Minamicon

    I go home in less than two hours, back to 56k pay-per-minute dialup, and I’m still waiting for the Minamicon 11 website to appear… argh, this is going to be annoying!

  • Glittering in the Sunlight

    For the first time this year I went out, and danced in the sunshine. The warm sun, the chill wind, the damp grass under my bare feet, and the glints of light from my (improvised) sword as it swung around under the beautiful sky… It’s times like these that I believe I can be happy again. That we can all be happy again… One day soon, the sun will shine, and it’ll never go out…

  • Playing Catch-up

    Okay, sorry… it’s been a long time since I last updated - pay-per-minute 56k dialup bites hard.

  • A Sky Bluer than Blue...

    Yesterday and today, temperatures reached 18 degrees C here, and the sky was almost cloudless for most of both days. Almost felt like Summer was here…

  • And so, the Bournemouth Meet did come to pass.

    Day One!

  • Noodles with Phi.

    Noodles with Phi. And Bee. And Angel, Char, Endless Rain, Fi, Flazh, Frieza, Fuse, GreenOpal, Jo, Kotori, OneCrazyMoFo, Roy, Rufus, Stel, Tasha, Tomoki, and Tyma.

  • We are Very Happy if you have Enjoy

    And so, the Bournemouth meet comes to a close. A day of dance games, but more importantly of saying goodbye. Thanks to everyone who came down to Bournemouth, and made this such an awesome weekend!

  • Fading Trails of Light

    And now, truly the last day. I got into town about a minute too late to see ER off at the station (sorry!)… then, lots of Shakeaway, Maplins and Pump fun later, Char and MoFo left too.

  • Waaaaa~~~

    At various points in my life I’ve had dreams that seem to be pretty much a part of the Dreaming Awake storyline… but this morning… this morning I dreamed of DA’s finale. Golden spears and magic swords and everything. Complete with the uber-headfuck moments too. Yay for messed-up-ness.

  • Blah...

    I guess now I realise why I don’t really like my parents, and why I do anything else rather than spend a day with them if I can avoid it… Although I still love them, I can’t really like them, I can’t be friends with them. All we ever talk about are menial things, like putting the washing out or cooking dinner, and the way they speak to me is at best dispassionate, and at worst, sometimes, insulting. We share no common interests, so whatever things interest one party are completely uninteresting to the other. And even worse than disinterest, some of my interests (most particularly anime, but plenty of others besides) I occasionally get insulted for. Even conversations where differences are good - philosophy, or religion, or politics, for example - are just met with a mental brick wall that stops the conversation almost before I’ve started…

  • Another Remembered Dream

    Last night’s dream… I’ve dreamt the same thing before. Some kind of huge battle in the great hall of a castle, in medieval times, then going to sleep and waking up to find myself in modern times, with the castle a ruin and the central part of some kind of theme park. Eager to get back to the castle, all the people (including me) who came forward in time break into this theme park together, but they soon disappear, leaving me on my own to dodge security guards in the forested ruins…

  • London Meet!!

    So much ownage compressed into such a short period of time. Today really was absolutely awesome. Pictures here. Umm… yeah ^_^; I really can’t think of a way in which today could have actually been better. A really awesome end to an awesome Easter holiday.

  • Back here again!

    I thought it would feel very odd to be back in Southampton again, but now that I’m here it’s not so odd after all. Going to the pub with my flatmates, coming back home and being on IRC… it all comes back so easily ^_^

  • Drifting away...

    For some reason, I’ve woken up with a really powerful feeling that I just don’t belong, that no-one really cares… especially to do with the internet. I don’t know why, though… I can’t explain why I suddenly feel this way for no reason at all…

  • Nothing to report...

    …except that today’s been really far too relaxed, it’s almost worrying ^_^; This new Programming lab module is amusingly easy…

  • Beautiful Days

    Wow… they weather today’s absolutely awesome! 17 C and bright sunshine, it really feels like spring - almost summer - here.

  • Unending Sunshine

    Yet another perfect day…

  • Triple-bill of awesomeness!

    Today, we went for a picnic on the common! Great fun, really nice weather, and I confirmed my belief that I’m awful at football. But still, an awesome day! Three in a row now…

  • Whoah, no updates for a week! But I have good reasons...

    Monday: Pretty much nothing of importance.

  • We have a house!

    This afternoon, we signed the tenancy agreement for the house! \o/ Also I have a new keyboard, so I can finally actually use my computer again!

  • Life Conspires Against the Need for Sleep

    And so a second day in a row of being up until 3:30am - less alcohol this time though, and more discussion of theology in general and Wicca specifically. I’m very definitely glad I stayed up for it, I rarely get to have discussions about that kind of thing anymore!

  • Super Fun in London!

    Okay, so… today!

  • Whoah

    That was an absolutely awesome night! It was Steve’s birthday today, and we all went to see Supergrass live at the Guildhall in Southampton. They were absolutely brilliant, and the warmup band - the 22-20’s - were pretty damn good too! All in all, not bad for my first concert ever ^_^ Afterwards, we intended to go to Jesters but seeing the size of the cue we all went to the Hobbit instead (a far better place, IMO). While we were there… DRAMA, I’m afraid. Vicky getting stressed, pints being thrown, and Steve getting very drunk indeed, although the last one’s not necessarily a bad thing!

  • I missed so many lectures today...

    Oversleeping for fun. In slightly better news, I got a fair bit of work done today, and also grabbed the Pop’n Music 9 soundtrack from Char (<3!) which I’ve been listening to for most of the day.

  • Birthday Fun \o/

    This afternoon, Gamesoc! This evening, an anime showing! Tomorrow, going out with my flatmates! Super fun days!

  • Bleh

    Okay, so I stayed up until about 4am last night. The evening was really fun, but the next few days won’t be… I have a lot of work to do by Friday, and my flatmates are also expecting me to go out tonight to celebrate my birthday. On top of that, I had about 4 hours’ sleep last night, and I’ll be having about the same tomorrow night. I have a headache, I don’t feel great, I’m insanely tired, I can’t work very well (great fun for the test I’ve got coming up in an hour’s time) and I haven’t eaten a proper cooked meal since Monday.

  • Aura and Adrenaline

    Well, despite only starting my revision three hours before the test, I got the highest mark that I’m aware of anyone getting, which is pretty good going ^_^; Also by lunchtime today I was feeling really rather good, and I got a lot of work out of the way, which means I’ve really got minimal amounts to do tonight or tomorrow morning.

  • Surreal

    That… that was strange.

  • Shinies and Stalkers

    Okay, so… weekend. I went back to bournemouth to see my parents, since I coudn’t see them actually on my birthday. I have much shiny stuff! I have a USB keyring flash disk, which is quite awesome, and also a new optical mouse which should stop me breaking normal mice. I have a shock legitimate copy of UT2k4, and a huge stack of CDRs that’ll let me reclaim some hard disk space from the hordes of anime. Also two new books (one of which I’m 3/4 of the way though already ^_^;) and some clothes. And money too!

  • Becoming More Like Kotarou

    So, my first day back in Southampton after the weekend.

  • Basic Food Hygeine

    Basic Food Hygeine for Flat 4, Gateley Hall

  • Catching up again...

    Sorry I haven’t posted anything for a while. Okay, at the moment:

  • Hurrah!

    Shockingly, I’ve got some work done today, and my bathroom’ll probably be clean for the room inspection tomorrow!

  • Bleh.

    So, I got coaxed into going out for a drink tonight. All’s well and good until about half an hour after we get to the pub, when my flatmates decide they’re going to go and catch a bus hlafway across town to go to the Cube (the Union nightclub). That’s not in itself a problem, except for the fact they didn’t even ask if I was coming or not, and they didn’t bother to wait to let me finish my drink…

  • Not much to report.

    It’s been a really quiet day. Downloaded some anime (Fullmetal Alchemist, Onegai Twins) this afternoon, spent this evening playing UT2k4 and watching more anime (Tales of Eternia).

  • Eeek.

    Four hours later than planned, I’m finally going to bed. What’s been keeping me up for so long, though, is Richard telling me about the story he’s writing… which, from the sounds of it, its going to be absolutely awesome… It’s all planned out really well - shame Dreaming Awake isn’t like that ^_^;

  • Awesome Dream

    “Can you tell me why, can you tell me how?
    Can you tell me why aren’t you happy now?
    Whatever it is, it’s really over now
    Can you tell me why, can you tell me how?
    We took them by surprise
    By leaving this place
    Some thoughts we left behind
    Some good and some sad
    You should know
    I hold you in my arms…
    You should know
    That I hold you in my arms…“


    ~ Apoptygma Berzerk - Love Never Dies, Part 3

  • Just a Few Things

    Yesterday, (while everyone was being IIDX-obsessed) I think I pretty much decided that I will, after all, cosplay as Shem at Minamicon. It’ll feel odd, cosplaying as someone who looks extremely evil ^_^;

  • Dreaming of the Calm

    Friendship, and…

  • An Ending

    I wonder… how did a mere forty-eight hours become long enough for a chapter to be a story in its own right?

  • Bleh

    So much for getting my laundry done, finishing watching Scrapped Princess and doing a ton of revision today… when I wake up at 2pm, I’ve got no chance of doing anything productive.

  • Leaving...

    “Hello, little star
    Are you doing fine?
    I’m lonely as everything in birth
    Sometimes in the dark
    When I close my eyes
    I dream of you, the planet Earth
    If I could fly across this night
    Faster than the speed of light
    I would spread these wings of mine…“


    ~ Hoshi no Koe (Voices of a Distant Star) - Through the Years and Far Away

  • Tomorrow's Super Fun Schedule

    MATH1007: Mathematical Methods for Physical Sciences, 14:30 - 16:45, Stoneham Dining Hall

  • Ebb and Flow

    So… an interesting day by all accounts. I intended to spend all day revising for my Energy & Matter exam, and I did get quite a bit of revision done this morning. In the afternoon, Eric invited myself, Nick and Fez to have a picnic on the Common - which was awesome. We went into town later and played some DDR, which was also awesome, and I found out that Fez is friends with Myst, and he also knows about IIDX and stuff as well! So strike three for the Southampton Bemani community - yep, that’s right, there’s a whole three of us that I know of ^_^; Whilst in Sega Park, we met another person, John, who bought us all drinks at Shakeaway! So… whoa. Today’s been absolutely awesome…

  • Just catching up...

    Yesterday

  • Bank Holiday Boredom

    Yet another catching-up post for what’s been going on this weekend. Basically, it’s not a lot ^_^

  • A Learning Experience

    First up: My computer finally has a GUI again! Six days of console-based IRC clients and text-only web browsers have been quite annoying… But finally, not only do I have an OS that I’m pretty much happy with, I’ve learnt a hell of a lot about it in the process!

  • The Looming Doom of Doom Looms Doomfully Over Me.

    In other words: In nine hours’ time, I have an Oscillations and Waves exam. I’m still completely unsure of what we need to know for it. There’s tons of formulae and I could never hope to be able to remember them all. On the other hand they are all derivable from a fairly simple set of basic formulae, but doing so will take up lots of time in the exam.

  • Is that Freedom I Taste, or just the Espresso?

    Note to self: Caffeine is not a good substitute for revision.

  • Twelve Hours TBH

    Twelve hours until the start of this weekend’s London festivities which will remove what little remains of my bank balance.

  • Awesome weekend!

    Saturday was the DDRFUK (plus a few DDRUK people) meet, and it was absolutely awesome! Meeting everyone again was brilliant, I definitely need to go to more of these meets! My achievements today - getting an A on Beethoven Virus, and spilling Lime’s drink all over the floor within a minute of his arrival. ;;_;; I win the prize. Also had a go at Valenti on Freestyle mode and discovered it to be the most fun thing ever. Inspired by that, I went and had a go at some DDR doubles and did pretty well, so I think doubles is the way to go for fun at the moment. I also need to get better at freestyle - my main problem is reading complicated arrow sequences, so I figure I could aim for doing simple songs while looking good rather than just going for harder songs all the time.

  • An Ending

    Staring out of the window this afternoon, it seems like hardly any time at all since we arrived here. And in so short a time, we made this place our own, and now all of a sudden we’re leaving again… So I guess that means a third of my time at University is done. Only two years left. I guess I’m being childish when I say I wish it could last forever - but I do, I really do. Every day here is full of wonderful feelings and wonderful people… When I think of some of the adults I know - how rarely they see their friends, and how lacking in emotion and adventure their lives are… Why? Why would people want to be like that? I want to always live like I do now…

  • Damnit!

    I just had the most awesome dream, but it faded so quickly from my mind… I remember it was set in London, and some entity that seemed to be God was killing off all the important humans one-by-one. But then, certain humans were quickly developing magic powers, the powers of ancient dragons I think they were, and the story turned into the reinactment of an ancient draconic war using magickally-adept humans as the dragons’ representatives on Earth.

  • An Eternity of Sunshine

    Despite the fact I’ve done virtually nothing today except burn anime onto CD, the awesomeness of today’s weather just makes me feel great! I hope it lasts…

  • Change of Plans

    Looks like my parents are coming to pick me up at about 10am on Friday morning. So I guess I only have one day left here, and I probably need to spend it all packing and doing chores…

  • Taking Down Posters

    Taking down my posters, I can’t help but remember the day on which I put them all up…

  • Oh, How I Wish for Sleep

    So, I went to bed about 1.30am - not unusual. Unfortunately I forgot to set an away message on MSN, so at 2.30am I get worken up by Ike’s incessant spam. After that, I manage to get to sleep until 5.30am, whereupon people start talking in the corridor outside my room, and the door do Jo’s room starts slamming once every minute or so.

  • Empty Cupboards, Empty Dreams

    So, that’s it. No more Gateley Hall, no more Flat 4.

  • Blue as the Sky

    Well, it’s been a week and a half since I left Southampton, and things are going… oddly. I’ve spent a lot of time at Adam’s (watching the England games and playing IIDX) and Dom’s (playing FFX-2 and Grandia 2, plus chatting about random stuff). Also visited Andy’s house once for more IIDX fun, which was awesome.

  • <3 Impulse-buying

    Logic3 Metal Dance Mat.

  • Stories Ending and Beginning

    I wonder if it’s a bad thing that I get so emotional about stories… Adding to my own rather emotional feelings recently, I’ve just finished watching Da Capo and reading the latest Discworld Novel, A Hat Full of Sky. Also, I’m getting very near the end of watching Uchuu no Stellvia and playing Grandia II. So, yeah… the ending of four stories at once is making me feel really odd at the moment.

  • Wishing the Future could be Here and Now

    I suppose it’s a sign that I was enjoying myself, when I didn’t think to check what time it was until I noticed it was already sunrise… (And yet, I still feel wide awake now even though I didn’t sleep last night…)

  • Endings and Beginnings, part II

    So there it is, the ending of Stellvia - and it was everything I hoped for and more. I just can’t get over the flood of emotions that come from finally witnessing the awesome end of something that dominated my heart and mind as totally as Stellvia did…

  • Under the Burning Sky

    It’s been one of the nicest days I remember, today. Not a cloud in the sky, and the sun shining down strongly… Shame it won’t last even until tomorrow, apparently.

  • Wandering in Beauty

    Today, I’m on an adventure. Walking aimlessly between the sunny sky and the verdant land, marvelling at the beauty of the world… Truly, there’s no better feeling than this… Although I’m alone, I’m still happy and peaceful… This is the kind of place I always long to be, the kind of emotion I always yearn to feel.

  • Up in the Clouds

    My work is fun, I guess… and I suppose watching TV and playing games at home are fun too. At least, that’s what I should think. Yet, it’s beginning to bore me after just a couple of weeks. Every day is a routine, and every day will be, stretching forwards ahead of me across the summer.

  • Hmm...

    I’m sure there was a deck of tarot cards and a couple of books on astrology around here before my mum “tidied” my room…

  • Super Fun Time!

    Fireworks fun tonight, and the DDRFUK Bournemouth Meet next weekend! This is going to be awesome! ^_^ It’ll be a nice change from the boringness of living on Portland…

  • The Bournemouth Meet in Glorious Technicolour!

    Prologue - Curry Night!

  • Those Things That We Leave Behind

    The light slowly filters in through my condensation-covered windows, shedding a dull and depressing light over the room which is to become my home for the next nine months. Somehow, despite sitting in a bright orange room, this seems like a place of greys, and of sleep. Maybe that’s just because Winter’s coming, though…

  • A Life Less Ordinary

    It’s a feeling, again, like the one I had when I first moved to Nothe Parade in Weymouth. Suddenly my life isn’t full of old things anymore, and there’s a new and exciting world that doesn’t mind me immersing myself in it. And it’s only the second time that I’ve been able to live in a house without the house owner being there too - this way, I feel like I can say “I live here” rather than “I’m staying here”. This house is full of interesting new things, just as my life is coming to be full of new and interesting experiences.

  • Stretching Our Wings

    And so, in six hours, the size of the Southampton University Anime & Manga Society tripled. I never imagined we’d be so popular at the bunfight today. A fantastic day from start to finish, I never thought it’d be so much fun!

  • Personality Addiction

    What is Love? (And I’m not referring to the early 90’s pop song by Haddaway (sp?), although I think I do have that on tape somewhere. Nor the L’Arc en Ciel song that I’m less embarassed about listening to.)

  • Slowly Beginning to Accelerate

    Lectures have begun again, with none of the worries or the irritances of last year. This year, I’m no longer apart from people, but rather everything I do is bringing me closer to my friends. Life is less of a struggle, but instead is a dance, starting slowly and gradually quickening in tempo.

  • An Apology

    My apologies for the being tired and sitting-huddled-up-in-the-corner bits of my behaviour at the party last night. I thought it was just overtiredness, but since I woke up this morning with streaming eyes, a runny nose and a sore throat, I guess I was kinda’ ill (I blame the Freshers). Not that I’m good at social situations normally, anyway, but I think I could have done better than I did last night ^_^;;

  • It's Like Coming Back Home

    And lo, the one who hadst been cast out into the wilderness for four lunar cycles didst return…

  • Myuu~~~~

    I want this… The scary thing is how easily I could afford it…

  • RIP My Arm Muscles

    Well, after pretty much no exercise in two years, I did four hours of Kung Fu and Fencing over the weekend. I think my arm muscles have died, and are trying their best to take me with them…

  • <3 Nightwish

    Ghost Love Score by Nightwish.

  • Shiny Things and Everything Else

    First up: Shiny things! I now have an extremely shiny new naginata. I’m really happy! ^_^ I wish the weather would be good enough for me to take it outside, though…

  • Forgotten Tears of a Grey Angel

    A single “mood” entry doesn’t really do these emotions justice. Right now I’m happy, sad, relieved, frustrated and lost, with an unhealthy dollop of self-loathing added in.

  • I Need a Shower.

    For someone who makes you sweat Niagara Falls in a gym that feels more like a sauna, Sifu is surprisingly un-scary. ^_^; I’m glad I re-started Kung Fu!

  • The Critical Mass of Mentality

    Having only started to get used to working on two levels at once, I now find myself trying to cope with seven.

  • Important Lessons in Life #1...

    …letting your housemates dress you for a fancy dress party is scary ;;_;;

  • A Weird Day...

    Today, I had to get back to my parents’ house for 10am. I found this out at 3am. Hurrah for four hours’ sleep!

  • Slightly Disturbing Dream

    I’ve just had one of the most disturbing dreams I’ve had in a long time. It was set in some kind of cathedral in which we (a cast made up of a mix of Physics students and DDRFUKkers) were slowly going completely insane. While remaining sane myself - or so I thought - I watched everyone else spiral into utter incoherence… Then, at the end, I found myself stood in a puddle waiting to hear a voice. When no voice came, I tilted my head back and screamed “God has left the world!” as I finally lost the last of my sanity… and woke up.

  • Woo Yay Houpla.

    Here’s to another five years of two overly-friendly rapidly-becoming-right-wing politicians mishandling the world.

  • Catching Up...

    It’s been a while since my last entry… Even though not much has happened, I feel like I should post something.

  • Hmm...

    You know… If someone had told me a year ago that I’d simultaneously have a crush on both one of my best friends’ girlfriend and a person I’d only met three times in my life, I’d probably have laughed…

  • Southampton Pagan moot

    …surprisingly un-scary ^_^;

  • Brain Fried

    This afternoon I had the Physics Lab session from hell. This evening, I spent most of my time playing Kerplunk as a drinking game. I haven’t slept for 40 hours now. And, I have to get up in 6 hours’ time to go to London.

  • Today's Super DDRFUK Adventure

    Today, both of my housemates and I ended up going to London, all for different reasons. This is my story…

  • A Day of Success and Failure

    Today has been weird in so many ways.

  • An Unchanging World

    In the past two days, I’ve said two things which I’ve gotten embarassed about - one much more so than the other - and yet life goes on exactly as it did before. I suppose I am thankful. But it’s finally beginning to dawn on me… after years of being totally honest to everyone… I have secrets again, now. I’m not sure if that’s good or bad…

  • Waving Goodbye to that Degree

    This morning, I woke up three hours early so I could tidy my room and get some work done.

  • Not a Usual Day

    Part I - How Not to Wake Up

  • Day of the Wildebeest Cube

    A lot has happened today… First off, I actually managed to get enough work done this morning that I’m not quite so horribly behind, and I’m now actually feeling quite confident about Classical Mechanics.

  • Voices in my Head, Personalities in my Mind

    Today, I stepped completely inside an illusory mind. But yet, it’s not so entirely illusory. When I think about it, there was one event in my life that set in motion a change that made me who I am today, emotionally speaking. Without that one event, I would be a person like Malachai. I’m not sure if it should worry me or not that I can step so completely inside his mind at will.

  • This Small Moment's Ending

    And so, another week finishes… Rarely have I been as glad to finish a week as I have been this time. So much of the last week was spent working, and although I still technically have a backlog of stuff to do, for now it feels like a few days of peacefulness are stretching ahead of me.

  • New Entries in "Understanding Minds" File

    I made quite a few notes on characters’ behaviour in the World of Darkness game on Thursday, and I’ve just got around to adding them to my file of notes on character and player psychology.

  • Wondering What's Real

    Only a few days after the whole Malachai thing, it looks like Kotori is strongly vying for a position as an anthropomorphised part of my mind. At least 12 hours and an overnight sleep since the game ended, I’m still thinking like her…

  • Tiny Shards of my Fractured Reality

    “Forever has gone, today is infinity…
    and yesterday’s dreams, today a faint memory…

    forever has gone, today is infinity…
    it’s time to move on, forever has gone…
    Two eyes in the face of billions of voices,
    I saw the flashing lights move further in the distance…

    (the) Dream was not meant to be.
    …And outside these walls I have created,
    the sound of stars colliding echoes in the distance,

    and dreams - they shatter…
    Let it break into a thousand pieces, let the wind blow it all away
    Dreams are fragile but our hearts grow stronger from the memories…“

    — Lia - Disintegration

  • Still Managing to Survive

    It looks like friends, fun and 13 hours of sleep let me recover from Monday’s weirdness. It’s for the best. I feel much better now, and nothing’s really changed apart from that.

  • Once More with a Lack of Feeling

    Yet again, another night of 13 hours’ sleep. Yet again, I wake up and gaze out of the window at the sun setting behind the trees. I guess that, slowly but surely, this much rest must be letting me recover. At least, I hope so. If not, I must try to resist my sudden urge to hibernate. Winter, as always, brings its own new set of wonderful emotions and feelings - and yet, I do long for the sunshine again…

  • Another Prize-Winning Day

    I first woke up this morning at 9am. By 1pm, I’d got used to the headache enough that I could be comfortable if I lay completely still. It’s now after 4pm, I’ve missed my compulsory Photonics labs, and I’m used to it enough that I can sit still at a computer. It still really hurts to move…

  • Obvious, but Still a Discovery

    Chasing impossible dreams is the only thing left to do once all the achievable ones fade away…

  • BSc Procrastination

    It’s now been nearly a week since I went to Uni. In this time, I’ve missed five lectures, a compulsory problem class, and three hours of compulsory labs. Up until this morning, I’d also done no work at all in that time. If there was a degree course in procrastination, I’d have an Honours. But sadly I’m doing a Physics course, so the next two weeks are going to be insane with work. The holidays are in sight, though - only two weeks left…

  • Half-Life 2

    Gamers of a sensitive disposition may wish to turn away now.

  • The Beginning of an End

    Well, it’s December after all. Allegedly. It still doesn’t feel like it.

  • In the last day...

    Of the last 24 hours, I’ve spent:

  • Verbal Open Heart Surgery

    Admitting to things I thought I’d rather keep secret was a strangely helpful experience, I think.

  • Imminence of Failure

    Woke up around midday today, and spent most of the time between then and 11pm feeling tired and as if I was about to collapse. Result - I got no work done. 7 problem sheets remain, to be done within 36 hours. Right now, of course, when I really need to get some sleep before my 8am start tomorrow, I feel wide awake. Staying awake throughout the night is tempting, but I know it’s a stupid idea.

  • Thrown Off-track

    I guess I shouldn’t be surprised… When they advised us that we should do the Data Handling problem sheets every week during the term, it looks like they were right. Doing the remaining five by lunchtime tomorrow is not happening.

  • Sensation of Conclusion

    Now, finally, it’s starting to feel like this term is ending. But not a sudden end, though - more like it’s fading; as we start to drift away for a while, trails of golden light disappearing into the darkness…

  • Approach of Conclusion

    Well… for better or worse, that’s all my deadlines for this term out of the way. And wow, that feels good… This afternoon - and especially this evening, at the ninja-costumed pub crawl (pictures soon) - I can really have fun!

  • Acceleration of Conclusion

    Well, conveniently the problem of whether or not to go to lectures today was solved for me - I slept through all of them. Even the one at 2pm. So, all that’s left of this term now is roleplaying tonight, Photonics on friday afternoon, friday night’s party, and three days of fading away…

  • Imminence

    Well, here we are, four hours from the end of this term’s Uni work. And, even now, it doesn’t feel special yet…

  • Passing of Conclusion

    So it seems that, almost without a thought, term ended… Not with a bang, or a pop, or even with a party. It faded, just like I thought it probably would. I guess that now it’s time to fade out for a while.

  • Of Rainfall and Farewells

    As seems to be traditional, days of leaving are greeted by stormy weather. Today, we said goodby to Mark until the new year as rain fell in seemingly-solid sheets around the house. Inside there might have been presents and mince pies (by the way, making them is hard without a rolling pin or pastry-cutter =p) but it still doesn’t feel like Christmas. Perhaps tomorrow, when I’m forced to venture into the pre-Christmas free-for-all mob that is Southampton city centre in December, it might begin to sink in…

  • A Last Meal

    Tonight, I ate my last proper meal here for a while - and also the largest I’ve eaten in over a week. Man, am I stuffed!

  • Leaving a World Behind

    So ended another term. It felt like an awful lot happened in these past few months, and when I think about it the time was full of memories being made. Happy ones and sad ones too, but in a way the emotion doesn’t matter. It’s memories that make these days everlasting - the best days of our lives.

  • A Sense of Completeness

    Nothing ever changes, huh? For a while I’m back with everyone in Bournemouth. Today was perhaps more of a reminder than a reunion - the day went just like they always used to, and left a warm feeling behind in our hearts. Walking home at the end of the night, I felt warm despite the cold, sober despite the alcohol, surrounded by friends although alone, and if I closed my eyes I could almost feel the world shining and beautiful around me. As if, with every step, I was coming closer to the world around me. As if I was complete.

  • Childhood's Epilogue

    As a child, I remember, Christmas was a wondrous time full of happiness and joy. Even as a teenager, although it had lost some of its wonder, I still remember looking forward to it. Over time, though, our approach to Christmas was changing. I guess the first thing it lost for me was a religious significance, then maybe when we got a fake tree, then when we started decorating half-heartedly, when my parents started hating having to cook Christmas dinner (yet would never let me help), when snow was only something from memories… Gradually, I guess, Christmas lost its magic. Now it’s Christmas Eve and I’m not even vaguely excited. I had no advent calendar to finish today, and my room’s not decorated. Slowly but surely, I think I’m learning what it means to be an adult.

  • Xenosaga

    Xenosaga > *. That is all.