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Today, even waking up at 8.30 and going to lectures in subjects I don’t really like seemed fun. Walking through the city, dressed in only jeans and a t-shirt, feeling the sun on my face as I looked up at the blue sky, and contemplating the fun that lies ahead of me, today and forever in the future… Today, happiness painted the sky gold and blue, for the first time since the Autumn.
I can’t really be bothered to do a proper update right now, but still…
Last week was insanely busy, despite the fact I had no work to do. I don’t think I managed much more than a few hours to myself over the whole week, and… I guess that’s probably a good thing since it meant I was spending so much time with everyone else, but it’s meant I’ve had no chance to relax at all. I feel like I need to be on my own for a while, but that might not be good. I don’t know.
Had my first lecture of the new semester this morning. Optics isn’t my favourite subject, but the course doesn’t look too hard and the lecturer’s pretty good. So I might actually make a few of my 9am lectures this time around!
Playing Kotori has possibly become more instinctive than playing Ian now. I’m not sure if that’s good or not. Talking about Kotori’s emotions out-of-character last night resulted in me admitting the existence of my two pseudo-secrets to Andy and Mark. I’m not sure that letting them know the details would be wise, but for some reason I feel I ought to.
The Quantum Physics exam was odd. To start with I turned up to the wrong place (damn this Uni for having two sports halls!) and had to run to the right one. I thought I screwed up the exam when I saw the latter half of part A and realised I couldn’t do any of it - it was all on the electron spin stuff that I hadn’t revised. Looking at the section B questions my heart sank - I didn’t think i could do any of them. But, it turns out, I’m better at working stuff out from first principles than I thought! And by the end of both B questions, I think I had perfect solutions. So, even though I lost 8 marks just by not revising the right stuff, I left the exam feeling really really good! That kind of ecstatic feeling you get when you realise you’ve done something impressive, and you’ve worked it all out yourself…
Anyway, that’s it for the exams. Next week’s going to be a little weird though… Everyone else is still revising like crazy, but I have nothing to do… Mostly I guess I’ll be sleeping, writing, watching anime and playing games, but that tends to leave me with that horrible “I’ve just wasted an entire week” feeling…
Okay, brief catching-up time. Sorry for my almost total absence from the internet (and IRC in particular) this week - exams and revision have been taking up pretty much all my time, so I’m trying to minimise distractions.
Monday’s Classical Mechanics exam went pretty well - a definite pass, possibly even a First as my lab work and problem sheets should pull up my exam mark.
Tuesday and Wednesday I practically wasted with oversleeping and procrastinating. Even in a house where everyone else is revising too, it’s still surprisingly easy - we all seem to get fed up of revision and need breaks quite often. Still, it’s beginning to amuse me how I work. Saying I work best under pressure isn’t the half of it - I only work under pressure. So I can waste time right up until the night before a 9.30am lecture doing unimportant things, and then… suddenly revise the whole course pretty well in about half an hour. Reading through the lecture notes and writing the important facts and formulae on a sheet of paper takes hardly any time, and suddenly the whole course comes flooding back to me and I remember. I see know why I couldn’t stand my mum’s approach to making me revise for school exams - it’s completely at odds to the way I work. Reading for hours at a time when I’m not in the mood it useless - but when I am in the mood, a whole course can be revised in minutes. It’s a little scary, actually! ^_^;
So, this morning’s Electromagnetism exam was a little worse than Classical Mechanics, but still a pass and probably a 2.1. With hindsight I probably chose the wrong question to answer for my second one of part B - I did question 4 because it was the stuff on reflected and transmitted waves that was still fresh in my mind from the problem sheets, but in at least a couple of the cases I couldn’t work out what later parts of the question were asking. Also, I’m crap at exponential calculus, it seems.
Anyway, after playing some Homeworld 2 (impulse-bought bargain ^^) earlier this afternoon, I decided to revise for tomorrow’s Quantum Mechanics exam. This was shockingly easy. I’m sure Quantum’s not allowed to be my easiest subject! ^^;; It’s got less emphasis on lots of equations and is more on the understanding, which makes it easier for me. I’m ignoring all the stuff on Schrödinger’s Equations in 3D though - I didn’t attend many of the lectures, and I think trying to teach myself that this afternoon will make me forge
t important parts of the rest of the course. Anyway, I probably won’t have to answer a question on it.
So, that’s the way my week’s gone so far. This afternoon I don’t know what I’ll do - probably play games while idly glancing at my Quantum notes. And then, at 11.30 tomorrow morning, that’ll be the end of my exams!
I have a Classical Mechanics exam in an hour’s time. Revision? No, that would be sensible. Instead, I’m playing Kanon. I guess, after all, I’m fairly confident about the exam now. A productive half-hour yesterday reduced the entire book into one A4 sheet of formulae, which I think I now know all of. So hopefully, the exam should be okay. But in the same way that I didn’t feel like anything important was happening in the build-up to Christmas, somehow I don’t seem to feel that the exams are that important, either…
One and a half problem sheets down, one and a half to go, due in tomorrow. Lab report progress: 0%, due in 2pm tomorrow. Viva at 4pm tomorrow. Doom.
Yet again I’m being horribly lazy, and have done no work today…
Still to go:
- 3 problem sheets for Friday
- 1 lab report for Friday
- Viva preparation for Friday
- Revision for exams starting Monday
I still think I have time, though… It’ll be okay!
Seven hours’ sleep in two days. Coffee, alcohol, chocolate, 12 hours’ of gaming, swordfights, Rammstein, tentacle rape, lots of demons and lots of guns. It’s 4am. My mind is broken. I’m going to bed now, and if I wake up before sunset something’s gone wrong.
Somehow, this past week seems to have happened without me realising. I’ve realised that it’s remarkably easy to slip back into procrastination in this house, I’ve realised how much this place feels like home, and perhaps more importantly I’ve discovered that I have a 6000-word essay due in on Friday that I’m never going to be able to finish, a lab report and three problem sheets due in next week, then a week of exams for which I’ve not even thought about revising.
But still, for some reason, I’m optimistic. I guess it would be weird if it was otherwise. But still, I sit here not doing the work I know needs to be done, sure that everything will turn out right in the end. After all, it always does. When I think about it, I can’t think of anything that’s ever happened that hasn’t had some kind of up-side to it…
This evening has been odd… I’ve got lots of stuff done, but none of it’s been work-related. Also I left the thermostat for the house on 10 degrees all afternoon, and so I’m feeling a bit ill now because I’ve been so cold… I just hope I’m better by tomorrow so I can get started on some work.