« Film Review by the Numbers
CHANDLER, a FAILURE, is secretly ZAC EFRON, a FAILURE. By the power of a CREEPY SUICIDE-JANITOR, he becomes ZAC EFRON again. Who is SEVENTEEN. No, really, I was as shocked as you.
EMBARASSING, POINTLESS HIGH SCHOOL HI-JINKS ensue, until at last ALL are overcome and sink forever into the PIT OF DESPAIR.
By the Numbers:
- Cheerleader upskirts: 5
- Slaps: 9
- Spock ears: 6
- Lightsaber duels: Somehow, 1
- Zac Efron douchebag factor: over 9000
- Scenes of main character flirting with ex-wife: 87
- Scenes of main character flirting with daughter: 24
- Scenes of flirting in Elvish: Somehow, 2
- Percentage of all scenes that are cringeworthy: 99.4 (the credits are just about okay)
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