For reference, my thinking behind awarding films their score out of 5 goes roughly along these lines:
- 5: I STUCK MY DICK IN THE LITTLE HOLE IN THE DISC
- 4: I’d have enjoyed that even if I were sober and not blogging it
- 3: The last two hours of my life weren’t exactly wasted
- 2: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT
- 1: I FEEL DIRTY NOW. I WILL NEVER BE WHOLE AGAIN.
- 0: I WANT MY MOTHERFUCKING SOUL BACK, HOLLYWOOD
- -1: Twilight
- -23: Zac Efron
Despite theoretical calculations, the score I would award a movie with the Jonas Brothers in it is still unknown to science.
Update: I reviewed Camp Rock. May the Lord have mercy upon our souls.