Synopsis

A bunch of WHINY ANGSTY TEENAGERS fight with each other for TWO HOURS, somehow still managing to prevail against a bunch of MORE POWERFUL, COMPETENT ADULTS. There is approximately a BEGINNING, but no END. Suddenly, NAZIS! MAGIC NAZIS. Thousands of them!

Also the WAND OF ULTIMATE POWAH looks like a SEX TOY, and VOLDEMORT is a HIGHLANDER.

By the Numbers

• Character deaths: 5
• Days spent at Hogwarts: 0 (are these kids aiming for the all-time truancy record?)
• One Rings: 1
• Deus Ex Machinae: 1 (per scene)
• Eyes in Pyramids: 0.7
• Macguffins sought by good guys: 7
• Macguffins sought by bad guys: 3
• Macguffins sought by CardCaptor Sakura: 53 (clearly she is more hardcore)
• LUNA: YES
• Bellatrix / Hermione torture porn: over 9000
• There can only be: 1

Overall: 3/5