Film Reviews (by the Numbers)



IGOR, a STEREOTYPE, invents FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER to win an EVIL SCIENCE FAIR. Unfortunately, said MONSTER is a DITZY ACTRESS. With the inevitable part-time career as an EVIL PSYCHOTIC DEATH MACHINE.

Also, EVERYONE FAMOUS who has ever been in a MOVIE, is in a MOVIE.

By the Numbers:

  • Percentage chance of horror: 100
  • Suicidal bunnies: 1
  • Baby seal boots worn: 2
  • Deer shrunk: 1
  • Performances of songs from Annie: 3
  • “Women problems” encountered: 0
  • Weather-control devices: 1
  • Cloudy with sunny spells: 0
  • Potato Armies: 0
  • Truman Shows: 1
  • Weather-control devices: 1
  • Monsters destroyed to the tune of Tomorrow: 6
  • Pants-related questions of Carl Crystall: 1

Overall: 3 / 5

2 replies on “Igor”

Waitaminute… nothing in this film produced a reading of ‘over 9000’? Why are you, and what have you done with Ian…?

Oh, bollocks! Didn’t notice that.

If you can keep a secret though, this is actually the fifth review that didn’t have one… 🙂

Leave a Reply