Synopsis

Enter stage left: TOMMY WISEAU, an alleged ACTOR, alleged WRITER, alleged DIRECTOR and alleged PRODUCER.

Exit stage right: OUR WILL TO LIVE.

By the Numbers

• Convincing lines: 0
• Convincing pillow fights: 0
• Convincing drunks: 0
• Sex scenes: 6
• Sex scenes that serve any kind of point: 1 (being charitable)
• Scenes with creepy background music: all the rest
• Minutes of my life I have now wasted watching Tommy Wiseau’s bare gyrating arse: 12
• Instances of bad dubbing: over 9000
• Instances of inexplicable American Football: 5
• Half-drunk Croatian cyborgs: 1
• Hilarious wife-beating stories: 1
• : 23
• : 87
• Sex: 48
• Drugs: 16
• Rock and Roll: -224
• Cheep cheep chi-chi-chi-chiiieeeeaaawwawwwwnnptht: 2.5
• Reasons why this film is called “The Room”: 0

Overall: -804 / 5