Synopsis
It’s a BAD DAY at C.O.N.T.R.I.V.E.D. A.C.R.O.N.Y.M. HEADQUARTERS, when WORLD WAR II SUPERSOLDIER BUCKY BARNES comes back from the dead to fight recently back-from-the-dead WORLD WAR II SUPERSOLDIER STEVE ROGERS.
But surprise! C.O.N.T.R.I.V.E.D. A.C.R.O.N.Y.M. was CIA/NSA/Nazis all along, and now CAPTAIN ‘MURICA and his SUPER FRIENDS must fight ALL THE DUDES until they save THE WORLD for this week.
By the Numbers
- Minutes of the Captain America is Better than Everyone Show: 17
- Bat-man: 0
- Bat-rock: 1
- Acrobatic arse-kickings: 2
- Jedi councils: 1
- Bullet-proof artificially intelligent flying cars: Inevitably so
- Innocent offices trashed: 619
- Super secret classified memory sticks hidden in vending machines: 1
- Lift occupants despatched: 13
- Lifts despatched: 1
- Apple store hipsters despatched: Sadly none
- USB sticks used to resurrect 1970s evil scientist AI mainframes: 1
- Inevitably evil Robert Redfords: 1
- Sam Wilson screen time: Acceptable
- Flying battleship Mexican standoffs: 1
- Obligatory 21st century heavy-handed evil CIA NSA surveillance killer drone plotline: present
- Steve Rogers / Bucky Barnes kiss scenes: inexplicably none
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