ELLEN PAGE discovers the NOT-SO-SECRET TRUTH that BEAUTY PAGEANTS suck, while INDISCRIMINATE VIOLENCE while on ROLLER SKATES is actually pretty awesome.
Also DREW BARRYMORE directs a MOVIE in which she gets REPEATEDLY ELBOWED IN THE FACE.
By the Numbers
- Giant Pigs: 1
- Gianter Hats: 1
- Non-grating pronunciations of the word “derby”: 0
- Suitably punny names: 34
- Percentage of this film that is an explanation of the rules of roller derby: 25
- Percentage of this film that is an explanation that the important parts are the punny names and the violence: 35
- Panty Shots: 15
- Balls grown: 2
- Bizarre t-shirt swapping mating rituals: 1
- Ferrets: 0